Kemper Breakdancing!

"Please, Kemper, Don't Hurt 'Em"

BY's Children's Books!

So recently, the Pizz has taken up reading.  Ok, so maybe she just stares at the pictures.  Ok, so maybe she just glances at the pictures while trying to eat the book, and then throws it to the side.

Anyway, we have been going through her sizable library (thanks family and viewers), which was so neatly organized and alphabetized by the Maine (ahhhh, back to her old bag of tricks!).  I have taken my part in trying to read to the Pizz.  But seriously, have any of you tried reading these books?  They don't make any sense.  Some are completely devoid of words too... just pictures.  But it really doesn't make sense.  I know, that these are kid books but why does the old lady have to whisper hush?  and why does she have to be a rabbit?  And what is a bowl full of mush?  Why do we have to have a Barnyard Dance?  Dinosaurs?  Dead and extinct!  (Although I am a fan of the Hungry Caterpillar...)

Anyway, I have taken it upon myself to create a nighttime book for the Pizz.  This has grown over the last 2 months to be incorporated into a live action book, that is now part of her nighttime activities....

I call it "Goodnight Kemper"...

(So the first scene starts in the corner of the Pizz' room, by the window, as we both look outside)

Goodnight outdoors.
Goodnight birdies.
Goodnight window.  (as I close the blinds)
Goodnight trashcan that holds Kemper's turdies...

(Now we move to her bathroom... just off to the left)
Goodnight Clean Cuteness Arena (long story for another time... basically its the bathtub)
Goodnight smelly sink (this is where the cloth G-diapers get cleaned)

Goodnight bathroom

Goodnight poopie stink

(Now we move to her closet... also off to the left)
Goodnight Nightlight Closet (light stays on overnight)
Goodnight Kemper's clothes
Goodnight books and toys
Goodnight shoes that protect Kemper's toes!

(Now we move into the hall)

Goodnight sad pictures of Haiti. (moving to the other side of the hall...)

Goodnight Picasso
Goodnight old building in Paris
Goodnight Hamiltoes!  (who is usually sitting in the hallway)

(Now we stand in the center of the hall)
Goodnight outdoors
Goodnight foyer (pronounce foy-yea)
Goodnight skylight
Goodnight to the day!

(Still standing in the center... time for Mommy solo!)
Goodnight Mommy!  (Maine peeks here head out from the kitchen, where she is usually cooking... "Goodnight!"  she goes back inside...)
Goodnight Mommy!  (Maine peeks here head out from the kitchen again... "Goodnight!" she goes back inside...)
Goodnight MOMMY! (Maine peeks here head out from the kitchen again... "Goodnight!" she goes back inside...)
Goodnight MOOOOMMMMMMMYYYYYY!!!!! (Maine peeks here head out from the kitchen... "Goodniiiiiiiiight!" she goes back inside...)

(We move back into Kemper's room)
Goodnight outside.
Goodnight Kemper's door. (Door closes)
Goodnight light (light goes out)
Goodnight multicolored floor.

(We proceed to the crib, where I gather her pacy and her fuzzy.)
Goodnight Kemper P
Goodnight my baby girl. (as I lay her down)
Goodnight sweetheart.
Goodnight my whole world!

(Then she goes to sleep)

Eat your heart out Boynton!!! 

Here We Go Again Being Green!

Yup, the crazy couple is doing it again!

We're renovating the Green Machine one more time.  This time is more for the long haul.

On deck first, replacing all the inefficient single pane windows (circa 1966) on the upstairs.

Second, replacing all those retro nasty dirrrty skylights/bubbles!

Then, once the bids come in, some landscaping, a solar water heater, and geothermal AC.

Soon we'll add solar panels and windmills.... ok, just kidding.

All to make our home more homely...

For the Royal Cuteness!

Kemper Does Espana Deep Thoughts... Part 2: Living there!

Sorry for the delay..


Best Modes of Pizzle Transportation:  well this is a tie.  The backpack and the stroller both worked great and served useful purposes.  The backpack allowed us to travel through the throngs of people with the Pizz.  The stroller gave her comfort. 

Interesting Notes on Pizzle Transportation:  the populace were surprised by the Cuteness in the Backpack...  By the looks of their faces, they didn't know what to make of it.

Sponsored by Maclaren:  Seriously.  Everywhere we looked and walked there were people with Maclaren's.  All shapes and sizes.  One seaters.  Two seaters.  One seaters with a back step for the older kid.  Strollers with all-terrain wheels.  Aerodynamic strollers.  Strollers with sidecars (seriously!)  I don't think we have ever seen more strollers in one town than ever before!

Ahhh, the Food!:  Simply awesome.  I mean bar after bar with yummy tapas and pinchos... ah the ham... ah the ham... ahhhh

Oh, and the Pizz's Food!  When we packed for the Pizzle, we brought saches of formula and packages of premade food.  However we had Ita purchase some powdered rice pudding.  But in Espana, there is no simple rice puddling.  They "added" several ingredients, including vanilla.  Once day, I tried it myself... and almost ate the whole bowl!!!

Changing Time Zones with the Pizz:  She actually did pretty well with changing times.  She converted seamlessly, without cry.  She was probably aided by the Spanish lifestyle.

Ahhh the Spanish lifestyle:  Pure awesomeness!  I mean where else is it expected to take a nap in the middle of the afternoon.  Businesses even follow this too!  Fabulous.  Also, everyone goes out and walks, taking their kids, and Maclarens, with them.  Bar to bar to bar... drinking and eating... ahhh lovely.... until 10-11pm... (then the old people have to go home!)

The Sobering Knowledge of Our Advancing Age:  The Maine and I couldn't do it.  We simply couldn't booze it up all night.  It wasn't because we were worried about the Pizzle.  Nope.  We just didn't have it anymore.  The first day of the festival, we started drinking at noon.  By 3 pm, we were drunk, tired, and hungry.  We had to walk home... the walk of shame at 3pm in the afternoon... alas...  The prescription for our malaise... naps!  and lots of them!

Arrrgh the Spanish Lifestyle: Seems that with our advancing age, the yummy Spanish diet (rich in jamon, queso, chistorra, and chorizo) and washed down with cerveza and/or vino did some serious tap dancing on our stomachs.  I have never experienced GERD as bad as those days... whew!  I even had to hit Ita's stockpile of Nexium to get through!  I might as well apply for my AARP card right now...

Spanish Livin' with La Pizz:  well, this was pretty easy.  Entrusted with a nice Maclaren, we fit right in.  We pushed her all around town.  On the bus.  In the stroller.  Morning.  Afternoon. Night.  La Pizz (her new Spanish rap name... or loosely translated to english: the pencil!) was all bout it bout it!  Best part was cold chillin in a bar around 8pm with the parents (well, as cold chillin as you can get), with La Pizz tucked in her stroller.  Nice.  We were proud proud padres for this one.  Especially when she subsequently fell asleep.  We can take this chica anywhere!

La Fiestas con La Pizz:  This one got sort of tricky sometimes.  Especially on the "opening festivities" when we tried to get out of the square.  It was a river of humanity.  Unfortunately, La Pizz was being carried by Maine, who held up quite well.  We all got separated, and somehow made it through to the other side unscathed.  Whew!!!  Otherwise, La Pizz just loved it.  She was usually strapped to either of our backs, and just gawked at everyone, and passed out Mucha Cuteness (of course)

The Revenge of the El Diaper Rash:  One of our command decisions before the trip was to go with all disposable diapers.  Overall it was going to be sooooo much easier to use them, instead of the G-Diapers.  Screw the Earth- we're going on vacation!!!  was my motto.  But realistically there was absolutely no way I was going to carry cloth diapers covered in babyboo across the pond.  Somehow I don't think that would have made it through customs.  Whew!  Anyway, one of the unfortunate byproducts of us going "brown" was that the Pizz got a royal mother of diaper rash.  I mean it really hurt me to look at it.  Every diaper change I kept layering on the white goup after the shock of seeing her red bottom.  There were a couple of times when we just left her bucknekkid to air out the old tushy.  I was always skeptical about these G-diapers, but when La Pizz came back and started wearing cloth again.... wahlah!  butt back to normal.  Seriously.  I'm green.

The Reason Why I Love America (Part 1):   Air conditioning!  Wow!!!  I guess the Spaniard are used to more cooler climates, but damn people, how about ponying up for some AC!!!  It got unbearably hot for a couple of days.  (Which was a little tough for me to decipher.... this whole Celsius thing...  They were giving numbers of 38s for couple of predictions...  I couldn't remember how to convert, but I did remember that 37 is a fever and outdoor fevers cannot be good.  Holy cow!  There were moments when I just wanted to walk around in my TW's.  Thankfully, for the sake of my wife and my parents, I decided against it.  Wow!


The Reason Why I Love America (Part 2):  TV!  Spanish broadcast TV is horrible.  Seriously.  There is only like 6 channels.  They don't show important sporting events (unless it's Spain).  They're news is utterly ridiculous (although you could probably argue this one point to a draw).  My favorite memory of Spanish TV is actually a tie: 1) the in depth reporting of Pulpo Paul and his "amazing" ability to pick the World Cup winner.  Seriously.  This squid has like 2 brain cells rubbing together, and all he wants to do is get a clam out of a box.  He cannot tell that the box is covered in the Spanish flag.  He doesn't know where Spain is.  Heck he doesn't even know what a flag is!  Come on!  I think they might have even questioned the Prime Minister about PP too.  Whew!  2) the in depth interview with the grandparents of Andres Iniesta (a soccer player for the Spanish side, who actually scored the winning goal).  But this was before he scored it.  It was pretty bad...  2 old ladies and a dude.  (Editors note: Spaniards are a lovely people.  In fact they are some of the hottest people that I have ever seen.  And this is not biased by my genetic makeup....  wink...  But when the ones that live in the villages age, whew!  they age hard!)  This was not Must See TV!  I was flabbergasted that this would be on national TV.  I can only imagine the press these old people had after they won!

Box Wine!  I have always been enamored with the idea of wines in a box.  But unfortunately, they have never lived up to par.  Until now!  Damn that Spanish rosea was phenomenal.  Don't forget the fact that it had a high alcohol content.  Woo hoo!  Too bad we couldn't take it back across the pond!

Dinner attire: So La Familia went out for a nice dinner together on Friday night.  The Maine and I planned ahead and brought nice clothes.  I had slacks and a button down shirt and the Maine had a nice skirt.  When my parents saw us they turned a quizzical look, "you're not wearing the garb."  Turns out in Espana during festivals, you wear the garb all the time.  Even to fancy restaurants.  Everyone of my family were decked out in white, with red bandanas and sashes.  Here were the two Americanos dressed in black!  Damn!  What can you do?

Los Primos!  Awesome.  I can't really say more.  What a great group of people.  (I mean come on, they're Yarnoz's for gosh sakes!)  We really had a blast.  I am sure you can see from the pics.  I have been trying to think of my favorite moment from the trip, but really I can't.  It was that good.  Hope to repeat it soon.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Well, now I'm not the 'young stud' in the household... nor the 'kept man'...  I am unfortunately the same age as my lovely wife.

Alas.

So what does it mean to be another year older?  with especially so much change in the last year?

Well, it's great.  I got to spend the evening with my lovely chicks!  We did a Family Andar around the neighborhood.  Then I fed the Pizz and got her ready for bed!

But, not before, we ... went ... STREAKING!!!  (ok, well, maybe not me, just the Pizz)  It's soooo much fun.... essentially running around the house with a naked baby, and then mooning everyone... the Maine, the squirrels, Ham, the outdoors... Classic.  The Pizz loves it!!!

Now it is time for the old geezers to hit the sack!

Good night Blog!

The Video Montage?

Apple is geared towards Multimedia....

My butt..

For the last 4 days I have been trying to get the Maine's MacBook to spit out a Montage of all our photos.  I used it, rather then the lowly Windows Vista, because of the thought that it was better and easier for this stuff..

Phooey

Damned thing is tough to produce.  It's like trying to use Chinese.  And then it spits out this mega-file that either 1) doesn't work or 2) can't get uploaded to the BY Universe.

Alas....  Will switch back to Windows. 

Probably won't have anything cool until this weekend.  Sorry.

Kemper Does Espana Deep Thoughts... (Part 1: Flying There)

Here are some very random musings from the Editor...

(Editor's Note:  This was going to be for the whole trip, but as you probably will be able to tell, got pretty long.  So know it will be split up into different segments...  Enjoy)

Best Part of Flight There: KP slept for most of it.  (the portable crib under the airplane seat was huge!)

Worst Part of the Flight There: Maine and I did not.  (not much leg room for the padres!)

Problems Flying with the Pizz: none

Scariest Moment of the Flight Over: when the airline attendant at the gate in Atlanta asked for our "Infant Ticket"... er... what Infant Ticket?  She's on our laps.  Turns out there is some international law that requires all passengers to be ticketed when flying international.  So after about 30minutes of severe frustration and GERD production (I mean its the trip or the Pizz type discussions), we had to fork over an additional $300 for a seat on the Maine's lap.  (So now we all know how much she is worth... hee hee)

Best Changing KP in the Airplane Story:  unfortunately nothing bad happened to me.  The Maine and I took alternating turns with the "hot potato."  It is a little cramped in there.  There is a high degree of anxiety, as well as dexterity involved at changing the Pizz at 30000ft.  At one point, I had 1 hand holding down a squirming Pizz, with the other fumbling around for wet wipes, while pressing my chest/abdomen against the portable table, with my foot against the wall for balance.  Fortunately no one was hurt in the experience.  The Maine, however, did get the "hot potato" dropped a couple of times with a golden shower to wash it all down!

Problems with Passport Control:  The fact that they only looked at our passports for about 10seconds total (for all 3) was very, very disturbing.  First of all, I was nervous that they wouldn't think that the Pizz was ours.  Second, I was trying to act all suave, to mirror my GlamorShot photo.  All for naught!  The damned guard didn't care for a second!  He was more interested in the slender Turkish female in the line to the right!  Sheesh!  I almost wanted to go back through the line...

Problems with checking in:  European airports are totally different from American ones.  There is no respect for lines, at all.  It is more of a suggestion.  Also, there are different lines for different things (that could all be reasonably done in 1 line).  Case in point:  to check in to the Pamplona flight, we had to go to the Internet Kiosk to do it.  Ok, no problem.  This looks familiar.  Now there are about 20 kiosks to check in to, but on 2 have a line.  Interesting.  So the Maine and I, being all too much about speed, try one of the free ones.  Broke.  Another free one... broken too.  Seriously!?!?!  So now, we wait to get to the kiosk and check in, and we have to check our bag.  It spits out the baggage tag, and shows you how to apply.  I follow the directions, and did so accordingly.  Then we try to figure out where to drop the bag off.  This is another line, which is essentially 4 times as long as the first.  In this line, I see everyone else holding their tags.  Hmmm.  Did they not follow the directions?  Then we finally meander up to a station, and essentially re-check ourselves in.  Seriously?!?!?  I mean, is this from the Department of Redundancy Department or what?  No wonder you guys lost the "New World"...

Spanish People Come in All Shapes and Sizes:  There are no better places to watch people then at airports.  Man this was interesting.  This though, however, comes directly from the one before it.  The problem with meandering airport lines is that you can wind up seeing the same people over and over again, with a small delay in between.  When first started our line, I was just glancing around and saw an middle-aged woman wearing a low cut tanktop.  This is where the excitement ended.  The tanktop had such a plunging neck line, that I swear I could have seen her belly button if I had not turned away from the hideousness of it all.  She had no top-shelf support what-so-ever, and was in dire need of some.  These fun bags looked like they lost their fun about 2 decades ago.  They almost drooped more then some elements of Dali's paintings.  It was with this severe shock and horror (which I do not feel that I justly portrayed), I turned away.  I instantly made eye-contact with the Maine, and knew instantaneously that she had seen it too.  It took about 10 minutes for this image to become unburned from my retinas, when the line meandered around and I saw her again! 

Airport Hunger:  Sometimes you are so hungry, you have only the option in front of you.  Turns out, our only option in front of us was McDonalds.  Go figure!  We come over to this lovely country to eat amazing food and drink tasty wine, only to be ordering a Quarter Pounder with Cheese, Fries and a Coca Light with our first meal.  I couldn't have felt more prouder about myself.

Best Item on McDonalds Menu:  Beer, on draught!  Too bad this hasn't transferred back across the pond.

Best Feature of the New Terminal at Madrid's Airport:  A free baby nursery!  Man this place was sweet.  Play room.  Cribs.  Changing tables.  Tub to wash.  Absolutely amazing.  Perfect for travelling with the Pizz.

Worst Part about this Baby Nursery:  We found this place 4 hours into our 5 hour layover.  Also after trying to bath the Pizz in a Family Bathroom... with a small European sink, some toilet paper, and a hand-blower/dryer thingie.  Damn, we spent more time cleaning up that bathroom then cleaning the Pizz.

Airline Safety:  Interestingly, the Spanish airline seemed much more concerned when flying with an infant in arms, then we do in the US.  They saw the baby when we sat down, and immediately came over with an infant life vest and an infant seat belt.  By this point, I was exhausted and thought they were gifts.  When the stewardess asked if I knew how to use them, my quizzical look gave us away.  Then she showed us how to buckle the Pizz into the Maine's lap.  (which we also had to pay for, but known more in advance...)

KP's Abilities to Pass Out Cuteness:  Man, this girl has got it going.  She was on her game the whole time.  Smiling and pointing to everyone everywhere.  She was on her game!

Welcome to Pamplona International Airport:  I get a huge kick out of this one.  This place is essentially a glorified bus terminal with 2 "gates", 2 "airport screeners", a large tarmac, and 1 runway.  There are usually only 6 flights a day, about 2-3 to Barcelona and the rest to Madrid.  I still can't figure out how it is called International.  Sketchy!

Pobre de P

With our successful return to NC, we have completed our wonderful "Kemper Does Espana!" tour. 

Over the next couple of days, as we still decompress and let our GERD resolve, we will have many a postings with pics, and other special effects...

Unfortunately Espana doesn't believe in the free Wifi concept, so many of our things couldn't be uploaded.  Stay Tuned!

We would like to extend our heartfelt thanks to our Spanish hosts (Ita and Wowo) as well as our wonderful cousins for their amazing hospitality.

Viva San Fermin! Viva Espana!!!

So, Maine and I have just returned from watching the riveting Germany-Espana match.  Viva Espana! 

We attempted to watch the first half in a local bar...  turns out so did 3 old Spanish men and a family.  The old Spanish men thought that had some vocal skillz... in fact, I think they thought that they were the 3 Tenors... Too bad they weren't.  Maine and I weren't feelin the love.

So we moved to Bar #2... much more cooler ambiance and cooler peeps.  And, of course, a Spanish GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLL!

And thus the Red Fury moves on to the Finals!  (too bad we won't be here for it... or will we????)

Anyway, the trip is going swimmingly.  The Maine and I are boozin it up!  (A separate post later....).  The Pizz is doing her International Tour of Cuteness to full effect! 

We are in full Spanish mode now.  We even have added to the Total Cuteness Accessories

Here she is, passing out Cuteness to a country near you!

p.s. Song of the Trip so far: "Pocket Calculator" by Kraftwerk...

Just another day in Spanish paradise!

Ahhh.

So what's it like.  Yesterday evening, we cruised through the streets of Old Pamplona.

There were many a Spaniards out and about!  (Editors note: it seems that Maclauren has taken over Europe.  Everywhere we looked there was a Maclauren stroller.  One of every different type and style.  Some were cruisers.  Some had extra stands for the "segundo hijo".  There were even ones with side cars!)  La Pizz loved her new cruiser.  It was like TV, watching all the people pass her by, with some A/C.

Then we met up with the primos, and did what Yarnoz' do best... drink.

We then adjourned to Mercedes house (which turned out to be essentially what we, ourselves, would have if we lived in Espana) to watch the partido!



After the wonderful victory, we adjourned for the evening....  however, at 11:30 in the evening, the buses were not running.

So the new familia Yarnoz decided to walk all the way home (with La Pizz asleep the whole way!).  (seems if you give the Maine a map and some directions, she can do anything... and feels independent too!

Today, after a long dormir, we cruised up to la Costa, to San Sebastian to visit Bego and Carlos.  They had a wonderful feast prepared for us... yummy paella!

So we ate, and drank, and talked, and made fun of Daddy!

It was a great day!

Say Queso!

Hangin' Out with the Primos!

During the game last night!!!  (obviously not watching the Spanish triumph!)

Drinking the Spanish Sauce!!

After a stroll with daddy and wowo...

Sent from my Verizon Wireless Phone

We're here...

Whew. The pizz was a trooper; slept the whole way. Now time to pass out cuteness... But too tired now to be coherent.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless Phone

We're Here!!!

Oh and how has the jamon, wine and cheese flowed!!!


Whew!  What a 24h!!!  Maine is not trying to put the Pizz down for the night.  She was an absolute trooper the whole time, only now melting down, most likely from a lack of legitimate sleep.

It definitely had its moments of fun, downtime and horror.  But we're here!

I'll be updating the thoughts on the trip later....

Ita and Wowo here I come!!!!!

Sent from my Verizon Wireless Phone

Let It Begin....

KEMPER DOES ESPANA!!!!