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Sunday, May 24, 2009
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Hello from Mike’s ‘Baby Mama’
I know, I know, this is Mike’s blog, and believe me, I’m glad for it, but the other day I thought that a cameo appearance was in order. Now that I’ve read Mike’s most recent post, I think I deserve a chance to document what I am really thinking (not that I’m implying that he lied – I probably really did say all of those things).
First of all, pregnancy is no picnic. Of course, I’m not a particularly pleasant pregnant woman, but any woman who says that it’s wonderful is certifiably nuts. (And women who pay surgeons money to enlarge their breasts to DDs and beyond should be put in a straightjacket.)
But this wild overdose on progesterone does have its interesting moments. The part about renting out your body is true --for 33 years every cell in my body has concentrated on making me fitter to survive, but about a month after conception all of that changed. Now I am nothing more than an incubator for the survival of the future Yarnoz (and have the hot flashes to prove it.) No longer do any of my cells care what happens to me. It’s quite the betrayal, really. The fact that this has happened for millennia boggles my mind sometimes.
Anyway, this is what I am really thinking:
Most miserable moment: Weeks 4 – 17 wanting to simultaneously eat and vomit on a constant basis
Most amazing moment: Watching Mike’s face the first time he did an ultrasound on me. (“Wow! That thing is big! No wonder you feel like crap!!”)
Strangest moment: Tearing up over roadkill. That’s when I knew I had crossed over and the hormones had me.
Worst experience of the first trimester: Interviewing in Wilmington with terrible morning sickness. Then driving around in a car all day looking at houses.
Best experience of the first trimester: Mike’s ultrasounds, reminding me there was a reason for all of this.
Worst realization of the second trimester: Whatever I put on, it won’t look good.
Best realization of the second trimester: I’m halfway there.
Worst physical change: Toss up between my mid-thoracic back pain and bigger butt. But the back pain wins. It’s a killer at work.
Best physical change: Probably not appropriate for the blog… The runner up is my own baby soft skin.
Weirdest physical change: The super-powerful olfactory nerve. The evolutionary reason for this is amazing. If I were a prehistoric woman and there was a stinky carnivore or poisonous fish anywhere near me this baby would be safe, I tell you.
Thing I miss the most: Haiti. No, ibuprofen. No, Haiti. Well, that’s a tough one. I suspect the first thing I will do when this thing pops out is take ibuprofen. So I guess it’s the winner. But I definitely miss Haiti.
Thing I miss the least: WINE! So surprising! I wanted to break all the rules but I have no taste for it. (I also did not drink coffee for 6 months… for those of you who know me, this is quite amazing as well.)
Biggest craving: Citrus fruits.
Most interesting thing going on at home: Well, besides the new jobs, new house, moving, etc, it’s definitely the fact that Hamilton has sniffed out the rival and knows his life is about to change. (Whereas Mike seems to have no idea!) I thought those stories about dogs sniffing out tumors was hokey, but he’s onto the teratoma inside of me.
Most interesting thing going on away from home: All the staring at my abdomen. And the knowing smiles from the community of women who are already mothers.
(: cal
First of all, pregnancy is no picnic. Of course, I’m not a particularly pleasant pregnant woman, but any woman who says that it’s wonderful is certifiably nuts. (And women who pay surgeons money to enlarge their breasts to DDs and beyond should be put in a straightjacket.)
But this wild overdose on progesterone does have its interesting moments. The part about renting out your body is true --for 33 years every cell in my body has concentrated on making me fitter to survive, but about a month after conception all of that changed. Now I am nothing more than an incubator for the survival of the future Yarnoz (and have the hot flashes to prove it.) No longer do any of my cells care what happens to me. It’s quite the betrayal, really. The fact that this has happened for millennia boggles my mind sometimes.
Anyway, this is what I am really thinking:
Most miserable moment: Weeks 4 – 17 wanting to simultaneously eat and vomit on a constant basis
Most amazing moment: Watching Mike’s face the first time he did an ultrasound on me. (“Wow! That thing is big! No wonder you feel like crap!!”)
Strangest moment: Tearing up over roadkill. That’s when I knew I had crossed over and the hormones had me.
Worst experience of the first trimester: Interviewing in Wilmington with terrible morning sickness. Then driving around in a car all day looking at houses.
Best experience of the first trimester: Mike’s ultrasounds, reminding me there was a reason for all of this.
Worst realization of the second trimester: Whatever I put on, it won’t look good.
Best realization of the second trimester: I’m halfway there.
Worst physical change: Toss up between my mid-thoracic back pain and bigger butt. But the back pain wins. It’s a killer at work.
Best physical change: Probably not appropriate for the blog… The runner up is my own baby soft skin.
Weirdest physical change: The super-powerful olfactory nerve. The evolutionary reason for this is amazing. If I were a prehistoric woman and there was a stinky carnivore or poisonous fish anywhere near me this baby would be safe, I tell you.
Thing I miss the most: Haiti. No, ibuprofen. No, Haiti. Well, that’s a tough one. I suspect the first thing I will do when this thing pops out is take ibuprofen. So I guess it’s the winner. But I definitely miss Haiti.
Thing I miss the least: WINE! So surprising! I wanted to break all the rules but I have no taste for it. (I also did not drink coffee for 6 months… for those of you who know me, this is quite amazing as well.)
Biggest craving: Citrus fruits.
Most interesting thing going on at home: Well, besides the new jobs, new house, moving, etc, it’s definitely the fact that Hamilton has sniffed out the rival and knows his life is about to change. (Whereas Mike seems to have no idea!) I thought those stories about dogs sniffing out tumors was hokey, but he’s onto the teratoma inside of me.
Most interesting thing going on away from home: All the staring at my abdomen. And the knowing smiles from the community of women who are already mothers.
(: cal
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
"How Do I Feel???"
Now that Charmaine is feeling better, I think it is time to publish my secret project.
Everyday since we knew of the new tike's impending arrival, I have asked M "How Do You Feel?" Most responses have been mundane.... But the humorous ones, now there we have some fun...
So I have dutifully kept a log of her responses, which are now included below. Enjoy.
"How do you feel?"
Everyday since we knew of the new tike's impending arrival, I have asked M "How Do You Feel?" Most responses have been mundane.... But the humorous ones, now there we have some fun...
So I have dutifully kept a log of her responses, which are now included below. Enjoy.
"How do you feel?"
- I feel like blegh!
- I feel like I'm renting out my body, and the tenant isn't very nice
- Feel!?!?!?!! How do you think I feel!!! Look at me, you bastard!!! It's all your fault!!!
- I feel like there is an alien inside me and ET won't Phone Home.
- I feel good. na-na-na-na-nanana!
- I feel like my appendix is up in my throat!
- I feel like she is using my left ureter as a baby rattle!!!
- I feel like there is a golf ball rolling around inside of me.
This led to a smattering of golf analogies...
- I feel like she's tearing up the golf course; she's 3 under par for the front nine!
- I feel like Tiger's brought out the driver to my lower back.
- I feel like a golf cart... and probably look like one too!
Sorry for the delay...
Sorry everyone for the delay in posting, or lack of posts, recently. I have been out of town for the big, yearly EP convention and took a while to get back into the groove.
Thanks to all for the votes on the Spanish names as well.
To which, in the coming posts, we are to see:
1. An American names poll.
2. Pictures
3. Another Ultrasound
4. A commentary from Charmaine?
5. Other random info
Thanks to all for the votes on the Spanish names as well.
To which, in the coming posts, we are to see:
1. An American names poll.
2. Pictures
3. Another Ultrasound
4. A commentary from Charmaine?
5. Other random info
Monday, May 04, 2009
Spanish Baby Names (For Real!)
Maine and I have been struggling with baby names... Yes, I know you can hardly believe that Charmichaela is not going to be her name.
Anyway, we have found some Spanish names that we are considering, and were wondering your thoughts. The unfortunate problem is that we are going to be living in North Carolina, where the subtleties of the pronunciation might be lost. (Maybe, Charmichaela will have to stick.)
So the poll is now up on the left, under the portrait.
Anyway, we have found some Spanish names that we are considering, and were wondering your thoughts. The unfortunate problem is that we are going to be living in North Carolina, where the subtleties of the pronunciation might be lost. (Maybe, Charmichaela will have to stick.)
So the poll is now up on the left, under the portrait.
Sunday, May 03, 2009
Saturday, May 02, 2009
The Green Machine!!!
Here it is, in all its Green Glory!!!!
http://tours.360vt.com/tvt/viewer/default.asp?pnl=slideshow&scene=403381&mkt=Wilmington&size=large&sa=n
Be sure to look at the 360 degree tour.
Just Lovely!!!!!
http://tours.360vt.com/tvt/viewer/default.asp?pnl=slideshow&scene=403381&mkt=Wilmington&size=large&sa=n
Be sure to look at the 360 degree tour.
Just Lovely!!!!!
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