KP turns 1 month!

Wow... How the time flies?

So what have we learned in the last month?

1. Well. There's no more "Couple Time"! Gone... Finito! Sayonara! Now its all about the KP and her needs! Damned if she isn't needy.
2. We've heard of how the 1st child reverts to babyhood when the 2nd one comes... But has anyone heard of the 1st pet doing the same? Wow. Poor dude. We've tried to make sure he gets his time too!
3. KP's starting to get some nicknames: Kempah P (her rap name!), Kemperpilar (say it fast, like caterpillar), Fussy Miss Fussenstuffs (sort of German), Fidget (every time I try to put the damned diaper on), Piglet (my favorite!), KP, Cranky McCrankers, Kempie, Burrito.
4. I love coming home, opening the door, and yelling: " Where ... my ... bi*%#3$ ... at ?!?!?!" Now, does the DQ like it? Hmmm....
5. KP definitely has her moments. The best: "Drunk on the Sauce" and early morning. Other times she's still pretty cute.
6. She's starting to go 4-5 hours in between feeding. Whew!
7. She definitely has her daddy's GI tract! Wow! I totally get to use the "Its the Baby!" excuse!
8. We've avoided the dreaded "Nipple Confusion". We were pretty scared about it too. I mean, wow, we couldn't have her trying to suckle on my hairy breasts, now could we?!?! That would've really been weird. Thankfully she is taking a bottle every so often and still gettin' it from the DQ!
9. The paci is our best friend! There is never a moment where it isn't in her mouth, or we're trying to put it there. I think we need like 20 of them, for all different locations in the GreenMachine.
10. Sometimes she just goes **plop** and the paci just shoots out. No warning. Then we struggle to put it back. It takes like 5 mins to do what she undid in 1 sec. Damn.
11. KP now has her own iPod. Yup. The DQ made a "mixtape" of music for her sleeping pleasure. It is all club and trance music, Postal Service and ADNY. I was a little concerned, not wanting to make my little girl a clubber. But then I sat in the rocker and listened. 2 hours later, when I woke up, I was convinced.
12. Speaking of which, I can't look at teenagers anymore. Too many cutoffs and midriff shirts! Oh god. I am only going to let her wear potato sacks. Maybe a smock. I might go the whole Amish clothing route. I wonder if I can find some of that stuff on the internet?
13. The DQ is solid and I am holding up my end of the Daddy bargain. I do my "Daddy Daycare" in the afternoons, so the DQ can go to the gym. She also runs errands and such. I should say that my Daddy Daycare is sponsored by the BabyBjorn. Those crazy Swedes concocted a nice little contraption there. She loves it. I vacuum with the Dyson, and she goes right to sleep. Must be genetic.
14. She definitely has the Yarnoz hair genetics. I am not sure how that goes for women. I'll have to ask my sister. But if that back hair starts getting curly, then we're in trouble.
15. Speaking of hair, I started getting gray chest hair. Damn. I was kind of hoping it would just fall out.
16. We've started using the G Diapers. You might ask, what does the "G" stand for? Well... it stands for Green. Hmmm... How can diapers be green, I thought they were the worst thing in the world? Well, someone somewhere made a green diaper, and the DQ found it. (actually the GC found it, but now she's the artist formally known as the GC). These things are actually pretty cute, and consist of 2 cloth diapers with removable inserts. These inserts then get discarded in the toilet. Wow, I thought, when I first heard about them, these sound awesome! The trick is that you have to do some manual manipulation of the insert prior to the toilet. Oh! Once I heard this, I was totally skeptical about the outfit. The first go around, I let the DQ do it. It actually worked well. Now we'll see if the KP can summon up one of her Tapioca Blowouts to really test it. I'll let you know.
17. We've started going to church. She actually does pretty well there, except for the fact that we're always running behind. We usually arrive about 5mins into the ceremony. The other day the DQ made some poor old man switch aisles so she could sit down on the end. He looked betwixted, but dutifully made the move. I mouthed to him later "Sorry, this is her first mass!"
18. Every time we see the priest, he asks about her. "What's the name?" Kemper. "Aww, what a cute boy?" Then we have to correct him. Then he asks "Whens the baptism?" Soon sir, soon. Now things could get interesting in the eyes of the church, if the priest tries to baptize KP as a dude. Hmmmm. This might almost be as interesting as when my baptismal church said I was already married. That might be a totally new slipup. Wow!
19. The GM reno is almost done. The new light fixtures are in. We're just waiting on some last minute electrical details and the final walk through.
20. I think we've finally solved the issue of the baby monitors. Damned things squawked more than the baby cried. Horrific shrieks of electrical interference. We tried moving it all over the house, standing on one leg, bouncing, doing the hokey pokey... Finally found the spot. Now we can sleep.
21. Speaking of sleep. I'm back on my regular schedule. I sleep like a log. Seems that I can get up, go into the nursery, pick up the KP, deliver her to the DQ, and then go right back to sleep. I forget that I do it too. My only problem is that I get confused to which side to deliver her too, and just wind up dropping her in the center.

Whew! That's all I have for now. Can't wait for Month 2 to reveal itself.